We were told to vacate the house that we live in as people were coming thru---Now just to get Himself into the car at 9-30am was a challenge--- but, I had to crate an enormous cat, and carry her from the upstairs down to the car in the garage--then crate Lopez, and then--- get big Beau into the car--I felt like I was driving around with the Toronto Zoo in our vehicle----AND----- We couldn't return until after 1pm-----4 hrs of driving here , there , and everywhere--I also question if the people that are viewing our home, are really interested----
So, not much was accomplished yesterday, and I had such high hopes-- himself now tells me that he intends to stay in this house until he dies----Maybe we both will---- sad-sad -sad---
I really am discouraged-- seems like a hopeless situation--- Anyway----We survived it, but--next time, I would not leave the house during a showing--stay on the dock--or the deck--
To change the topic here--- we have Ms Robin sitting on her nest just outside the study window-- I took her nest down 3X --but she must've snuck the 4th nest up there over nite--and there she sits now on her eggs-
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I was hoping you had a good day yesterday considering you weren’t able to enjoy your favorite day. Sometimes, I wonder if it may be easier to stay where you love and get more help. I think about the dogs and Sushi and all the changes for you and Himself. Decisions. I do know I wouldn’t go through that again packing up the herd to leave! I would stay outside at the dock as you say or whatever! Make sure when people view your home they have proof of the money/bank letter. That is the way in Ohio and probably other places. Maybe there too. That way you know it isn’t a waste of time. Well, stay strong. It will all work out! Been thinking about you. Going out to plant shrubs. Have a lovely week. Hugs!
ReplyDeleteI don't know whether I'm coming or going-- Hopefully the place I get to see Friday is better than the last one-and I know it would be so much easier on both of us to just stay here--till it --I suppose I should look for a snow plough person-- in case we are left here-- Lynda
DeleteIt's Kathy - yes, keep your chin up. If it's meant to be it will happen. I just returned from a closing for the home my daughter bought. My husband and I had to go because we had to co-sign for her. She had to find a place to live because the father of her 2 children is very abusive and has been arrested for domestic assault - twice, well the second time was violating the domestic abuse court order. She had to be out of their current home, which he owns outright, by June 1st. And her only job right now is being a Personal Care Assistant for her 2 Autistic boys ages 3 & 4. It seemed like an overwhelming task but today we all signed and she moves in next week. A miracle for sure. So there is always hope. Please don't get too discouraged. I completely understand because some days I feel like I will never heal after all my recent surgeries. But you are the strongest woman I know and himself will just have to listen to you! You are in my thoughts and prayers daily. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteOh Kathy--YU are so good to help your daughter--i view another small home in town on Friday----have to wait and see-- it is supposed to be fully renovated--but small-- lynda
DeleteYes, IS possible! Like Kathy above says, “If it’s meant to be, it will happen. Hugs. 🤗♥️ Dorothy
ReplyDeleteIt has to be the right house if we move--- in town would be good also--- not looking good tho Dorothy right now-Lynda
DeleteLynda, from what I have learned since David passed? and had to move out of our home in Alabama and move to Illinois, I'd stay there. I know it is tough for you, but the move would have killed David before his time, it
ReplyDeletewas that bad. packing everything will fall on you, and then you have to get someone to load it up and move it, then you have to unpack.
My advice, stay where you are at least while Himself is still with you, because the move will only confuse him worse and maybe the outbursts will get worse. When you are young, moving is more of an adventure....now, it is plain torture.
I feel you are right Darlene--Already he is upset--and if the house isn't suitable it would be best to stay here--It has to be the right house if e do move-- better to stay here if its a horible place--Lynda
DeleteWhat a lesson for other folks in the same fix, Lynda. No plans made for the future, we just, “let it happen”, if you are the first to go down, will the government place Himself somewhere? Or if you are injured, can you afford to hire a full time Sadie, 24 hrs to take care of the whole property? Plus take care of Himself? We older folk hate to admit we are not fit, so wait too long to make changes when we have better health, and all our wits. The lawyer who wrote up your Will should have discussed all of that with both of you. Now it’s all being based on wishing and “if only”. So sorry for this to happen. Tougher than it should be, I’m afraid. Thank goodness you are trying your best, doing more than many other folks would do, but you are wearing yourself out, too. Sigh….
ReplyDeleteNo--It would be so much easier on me to live in a smaller place--if its a nice place--Lynda
DeleteI sold my home in 2014-15. You can tell the realtor it is too difficult for you to vacate each and every time. They usually understand. Hugs! Donna_cps2
ReplyDeleteDonna thank yu-I will never vacate again--I will stay somewhere near the house here-Lynda
DeleteMarti here. I'm confused; how come you didn't get to view the other house in town?
ReplyDeleteI did view the other one which was not a good choice for us-- Yu know Marti--I view another house on Friday-- I have never been able to get into the one we wanted to view--Do yu mean that one?--The Lady seems unsure of selling--Lynda
DeleteHi Lynda: I think it would probably be easier to stay where you are providing your sons Will promise to help with the upkeep and chores as you cannot possibly do it all yourself. I doubt that himself would ever settle somewhere else. You also need to get more help from the Alzheimer’s Society to help at home. Hopefully it can all work out. Hugs Brenda
ReplyDeletehi Brenda --Himself is already balking at the move--when and if we ever fnd the right house --Yu might be right--stay here--Lynda
DeleteI believe anything IS possible! It's been proven in my life. Just believe, dear...visualize the home you want, the people buying your home maybe a young family with strength and fortitude to care for the property. "See" yourself comfortably living in your new home all of you happy. If you have a negative thought about the move and sale, "pivot"..."but we could...and it would work out for everyone." Or something like that.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to do those things when life seems to come at you all at once. I do understand that. There have been times I have really had to word to pull myself out of a funk.
The photos look wonderful. I can't think of a young family who wouldn't love living there.
Keep at it, honey. You'll get there yet. You have a lot of people rooting for you! {{{HUGS}}}
Yu are so good to think of all that--- Thank yu---Right now it feels like a huge mountain that I have to climb over--Lynd
DeleteIt is so hard to have your house on the market and to keep it “showing ready”, in addition to dealing with the 3 fur babies and Fred!! Plus, you’ve found nothing you really can see yourself living in…I definitely would feel discouraged, too!!
ReplyDeleteI think you really don’t want to leave the home that you have because it is such a wonderfully scenic location and has been your mainstay for decades BUT with aging and Fred’s needs, it just is such a struggle to maintain….I get that, just went thru it myself…so hopefully you will find somewhere that makes sense…just keep hanging on, OK!!❤️ Eissa7
Eissa-- I view another on Friday --in town--- very small-- but --small is good if it is oK inside-- -Yes, this house is our home--- but a lot of upkeep--mega $$$ to keep it going every month--just have to wait and see I guess-Lynda
DeleteMargene--I love your advice-Thank yu- Himself does not want to move at all---and yes, he will be confused--and--- it will be very tight on the budget to stay here-- but---it really would be easier on me once I am settled in a smaller place--I shall keep looking--but--this was a mining town and there are not a lot of houses which are suitable--We will see I guess-- Did you move yet??--Lynda
ReplyDeleteOh my! Sorry to hear that yesterday was not a good day! I feel your pain. I do understand how hard all of this is for you. I do not want to leave my "way too big" house - but all my memories are here and I like my house. Everything I look at makes me sad because the houses don't seem to be half as nice as what I have. The problem is the work that comes with a big house and 4 acres of land to mow.....maybe some day I will be able to just pay somebody to mow and clean, etc.....and I think I would have a hard time seeing somebody else living in my home - so if I can get rid of a lot of the stuff that we've accumulated, I think I will feel more content here. Don't give up your dream....you are a strong, smart woman and you will get everything figured out..... I have faith in you!
ReplyDeleteOH my goodness! From 1 pm to 4 pm for a showing! That’s incredibly loong, to me. Yes, for sure, it would be a whole lot easier for you and the gang to stay on the deck or the pier during a showing. **SIGH** There is just NOTHING easy about selling a home.
ReplyDeleteAS for the snow plough, I would at least get myself on the LIST NOW so IF you need it, you’ll get service. That’s what we had to do and it worked pretty well.
Have to agree w/2DARLENE – Those w/any kind of dementia tend to do better being in the same environment for the long run – UNLESS, obviously, Himself becomes a danger to himself or someone else. And to do that would require lots of help, for sure. Lots to think about.
HUGS and good luck. Just keep looking and if it’s meant to be, it will be.
The suggestion to contact your Alzheimer’s Society is EXCELLENT! I should have though of that as I did that too. Ultimately Mom and Dad ended up in Memory Care due to a medical emergency they both had, but in the meantime, Alzheimer’s Society had lots of good advice and help.
HUGS, HUGS, HUGS
Barb
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