I was out snow blowing--Son#1, went whipping by me--in his truck--peeped---and kept on going---Kids! Grown-up boys , who are men--- seeing their 80 yr old Mom out there trying to clear the drive way, and doesn't even stop-- What has become of all of us?-- We are the Moms who brought them into the world, and you would think, out of respect, they might at least stop! Am I angry?---- You bet I am! --- That's what they think of their mother!--- GRRRRR!--
I did the whole driveway--- if the snow plough goes by, the neighbour said he will clear it out beyond the gate for me!---So----- Do you ever feel angry at your grown kids?--- I mean, as angry as I feel right now?-- Do you ever feel disappointed with them?--Am I alone with all these thoughts?--
So, to change the subject, Himself and I are going to get bananas---and veggies and fruit-- hopefully not too much--We will take Lopez---
There!--I feel better already--I think! -- Do you find that on some days, it is hard to be a Mom?--- Oh Dear! I am still giving my misery "power"-- --I need to hear from you all-- to help me go calm down--LOL----What on earth would I ever do without you all-???
I am off got the grocery---Remember--- It all begins and ends in your mind! ---
I have one out of my three kids that really can push my buttons that I get really mad at him and he just seems to take it in stride and then we've made up. But he's also the most sensitive young man at times and yesterday he helped me so much when it was he that learned a friend of mine had passed away. He sent me the cutest gif of Kermit the frog being hugged by Bobo the Bear. Here's a link to a photo. It really was nearly the same as getting a hug from my son, who's 6'4 and I'm now 4'10.
ReplyDeleteHUG
Unfortunately, when I click on the link I get no picture, just a space where a picture would be.
DeleteDo yu have the right link?-- Try again-- because early this morning I typed the link in wrong--It has been corrected since-I am so sorry-- I guess I was so upset--I lost my mind--LOL-- Please try again-Lynda
DeleteThat is so nice that yu have him-- YU are fortunate-Lynda
DeleteKids always make you mad. After all we have done for them and a lot of them expect it to keep on. I don't know why yours are like that. I am sure you did not raise them like that and neither did Himself.
ReplyDeleteWEll, yu made me LOL-- Thank yu--Seems it is just the way it is nowadays-- I best never expect help-- then one isn't disappionted-Lynda
DeleteYES Lynda I get angry at my son and YES I get disappointed. We're over here left to fend for ourselves.
ReplyDelete.. .what's worse we moved here to be closer to him and then after 20 yrs of marriage he got divorced and moved an hour from here. I was hurt and very disappointed. Still am. I haven't let it go yet although I know it only hurts me. We were home alone on Thanksgiving and Christmas and didn't even get a call. I understand EXACTLY what you are saying. I'm sorry Lynda. Son could have at least stopped!!!
I have to go out for bananas too. Snow coming in tonight 4 to 6 inches. That will STOP St.Louis.
Hope your day improves. Attitude change for both of us. Having no expectations out of kids ain't easy..play your piano.
Hugs
Margene--YU sure do understand-- It is disappointing! Lynda
DeleteYou are not alone in terms of having adult children who choose to detach from their parents or don't even think to check in. And yes, sons seem to be worse than daughters. Pre-pandemic, when I was going to the gym and talking with gym friends, it was a revelation to hear how common this seems to be -- even some estranged -- and that's just among a smallish group of people.
ReplyDeleteMy stepson has pretty much opted out of sharing any family information with us -- for example, they told us about a cross-country move the week before it happened -- and hasn't acknowledged my husband's birthday in years. His wife makes sure we receive the grandson's wish list for Christmas and birthdays, though! Contrast that to a couple of nieces who check in on a regular basis. You can't force somebody to engage if they don't want to. (We have changed our wills accordingly.)
It does make one very sad doesn't it?-- Lynda
DeleteI feel your pain. I only have one son and he has been estranged for over three years! We moved here to help with the small grandchildren. I go from mad, sad, upset, etc. I could deal better if there were no grandchildren in the picture. So hard on a person to go through this with adult children. We have to stay strong. Hugs!:)
ReplyDeleteYU are so right-- It does make one sad--disappointed in the grown kids-- Lynda
DeleteOh my goodness. Ummmm . . . I’d not be too pleased if my son whipped past me as I was struggling to clear the driveway! **SIGH** Gotta wonder what is on their brain sometimes!
ReplyDeleteNope, definitely you are not alone in those angry w/adult kids sometimes thoughts. For sure. They don’t have any sense of how difficult it is as we age. Sometime it’s hard to let it go.
((((HUGS))))
barb
1crazydog
Well Barb-Times sure have changed!-- Lynda
DeleteLynda, you have every right to feel hurt that your son just buzzed by you, as you were out snowblowing! Do the sons have problems with reading cues, perhaps they think you are still 50? What did Himself say, when you told him what happened? I hope you could get good, fresh bananas today. I’m hungry for some, too. Next time you see this son tell him, too bad he did not stop for coffee, find out if he had an emergency. Are you afraid to ask for help? So sorry this is going on. Do they ask about your Will though?
ReplyDeleteFunny you should ask-- I offered this house to Son33and he wants a deal-- --No!!! THere are no deals--I must've brought them up wrong--YU think?--Lynda
DeleteI never had kids and when I hear this stuff, I'm not sorry. Just a dog works fine for me. With all you do, maybe they think you don't need help. In my opinion, that's an excuse for them to not help. They are all big guys who are perfectly capable of helping. One was out recently doing some clearing but I suspect it was clearing out back for ice fishing. Keep those neighbours that want to help around! And don't let those thoughts keep you awake because it will do no good.
ReplyDeleteWell, Brenda-- I am pretty disappointed in the boys who live in town----It took mall day to clear the snow--I fell on my one k ee too-0-so it is pretty swollen--Even the neighbour did not appear--0Oh well--L-Nice to hear from yu-Lynda
DeleteLynda, did you connect with your son yet to see why he rushed off in such a hurry? He may have had a good reason...and maybe not. In any case don't give your power to feel good to him! Like you say, it begins in our minds.
ReplyDeleteHope you enjoy your shopping trip. Also that you have a helpful neighbor.
I did get angry with my daughter and son-in-law summer before last. My California doc son and his family came out to the Wisconsin Dells area to visit. Don't remember if my Chicago sons came, but my daughter...only 45 minutes away...did. She had to go on a highway right past where I live...AND DID NOT PICK ME UP TO SEE EVERYONE! I was so angry! She made some kind of excuse like...well, there had to be room in the van for the dog.
Sheesh!
But it's only "water under the bridge." A friend where I worked for the State of Illinois got my name in a holiday gift exchange drawing. She tog me 3 little plaques...about the size of a dinner plate. One says, "Remember yesterday," the next "Live today," and the third, "Dream Tomorrow," I have them hanging in the bathroom over the throne.
{{{HUGS}}}
WEll Barb-It has been a hard day--makes me sad that they don't think of us-- It sure would be nice if they would even call and offe-- I realize they do have their own lives--but--oh well-- Lynda
ReplyDeleteThis is paceka1 - for some reason Google won't let me log in! I feel your frustration. I have 5 children and they all asked what they could do after I had my spine surgery. I said please visit and bring cookies. I had only one visit and very few cookies. I couldn't do anything - no cleaning, bending, twisting, etc. - for the first 3 months. In the past we've asked them to come help us paint our house - two said they'd give us money so we could hire it done. And honestly, we tried but the painters never came back! Frustrated - yes. Angry - sometimes. Love them - well, that never goes away, does it! Hang in there. Think of all the exercise you're getting!!!
ReplyDelete